Tuesday, June 30, 2009
"Are You Blind"
My homeboy called me this morning yelling in the phone pissed off with his wife. When he finally calmed down he was telling me about how she seems to think things that he does are just average but when another male does the same thing it’s so sweet. He was like man I don’t see it what the heck am I doing wrong these dudes just do this stuff when they have messed up this is my everyday routine. She doesn’t have to look for me at night she knows my every move. The thing is her friends think I’m the best thing in the world, but why can’t she see what they see. True enough we live together and it’s things about me that they don’t know but that’s only 10% of the real me. Everybody has their faults, but why is it that you have on a consistent bases what your friends get from time to time but it’s nothing to you? What’s the problem? Do you not appreciate me? O boy! Now people do you have it so good that it’s second nature and you have lost appreciation for your blessing? What ‘s up?
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Ooh baby, sounds like she has gotten complacent. But, what are the things he does consistently and what are the things she thinks are so nice the other men are doing for their women. It maybe that what he is doing is taking her out to eat, movie, wash her car, drop a few $$$ in her purse. Maybe the other men surprised their women for a lunch date, sent flowers just because. Maybe it is a new relationship the couple is in that she admires and its the newness of it all. I think he just simply needs to ask her what she wants. What is the problem? How long have they been married LL?
ReplyDeleteWell sister pearl they have been married for about four years I think. He does a lot of cooking, cleaning car washing, taking care of the kids you know some of the so called woman’s duties. So I don’t know I only got his side of the story.
ReplyDeleteShe might think the grass is greener on the other side! But what she doesn't know is that the season will soon change and then where will she be? Appreciate the man you have for he might not appreciate you!
ReplyDeleteI with Black Pearl. I think women often times get complacent with what we have and take for granted the things men do. However, I think men will often present the things they do as if they're doing us a favor. LL you said he washes the car, cleans, etc. but he's SUPPOSED to do that. It's 2009. There's no such thing as a woman's duty. If I'm busy or sick, you should be able to step and clean, help out with the kids, etc. That's not special, that's responsible. He should ask her what she wants because it is often the simple things with women. As BP said, he could be that she desires to have him stop by on the way home and get flowers; email her in the day just to say I love you; offer to let her have a few extra bucks for dinner/shopping with the girls. I think women appreciate what men do however, we all must go above and beyond to what's expected of us and more.
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong I agree that both parties should be resposible for taking care of the house. Now what does not need to happen is one gets so comfortable that you don't do anything and espect the world.
ReplyDeleteBlack Pearl and Nelly hit it on point especially Nelly....it is the simple things with women. There is this book called "Five Love Languages" and it talks about what shows your mate you love them. Now the husband may not be the type that is moved by receiving flowers, text messages simple things like wifey, but that is what reminds her of his love...that's her love language and he need to speak it to her. Now husband's love language may be sex, cooking ect..she needs to speak that to him. Find out your mates love language because it is so important and makes a great difference in relationships. Now if she has told her husband that this is what she likes and he still doesn't do those things then they have other issues (well he do).
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